Well, here I am again. I really do intend to write daily, though adopting this discipline is challenging, as one might expect. I get so busy; maybe better said, I choose to be so busy that is hard to make the time for this important thing- writing/reflection. There is so much I want to accomplish, and the need to produce, to do, to distract myself from the inner life is so thoroughly entrenched that it seems as much a part of who I am as the need to breathe. The challenge to "simply" be is one that I can not even adequately imagine. Still, I do imagine it, and I wonder what secrets lie hidden in the stillness of my hoped for inactivity. I wonder if what lies there is simply my unadorned, unencumbered self- a self loved unconditionally by Jesus, awash in the grace of God- a self that is ready to be, and to love. In any case, that is the self I hope to become/uncover as I journey more fully into the abundant life Jesus has for me.
Of course, I recognize the truth of what I wrote above- that the need to do is so entrenched that it may never be successfully extricated from my core identity, and so I am glad for the season- for Lent. I pray that the mystery of who I am and who I am to be in Jesus will be wrapped up in that of Jesus’ journey to the cross, and that I might be counted worthy of dying with him and rising again to new life. I am glad to take this journey, however haltingly, today, and I pray too for the strength to undertake it again with each new day…until all the days of my life are at an end, and I am ready to begin that part of the journey which days can no longer measure.